I have never been one to pick up on any sort of signal. All signals, as a matter of fact. If you can name it, any sort of signal, I won’t pick up on it. Believe me. Turn signals, for example. I for sure use mine. I know I do! Other people though… Well, to be perfectly honest, I can’t complain about others not using their turn signals, because I don’t pick up on them. I don’t … [Read more...] about Signals
The Drivel Dispatch
No’s for November
November is a time traditionally set aside for “don’ts”. Meaning, popular culture has taken on the “no” in November and made the entire month a challenge for whatever people see fit. “No-Shave November”, “Dry November” for no alcohol, or “No-Nut November.” I would like to propose more options for what we should all aspire not to do this month, for your consideration. “No … [Read more...] about No’s for November
Halloween Decor
After having spent some time perusing the town, I have come to a disappointing conclusion: most Ely homes are lacking Halloween yard décor, and those that have put in an effort clearly need some direction. And so, here are my pro tips on how to spook-up your property the right way. Especially before All Hallow’s Eve passes us by. Bats: These rats with wings are a staple of … [Read more...] about Halloween Decor
Out Driveled
I find myself in need to apologize. I would specifically like to apologize to all the dedicated readers of the Drivel Dispatch. To all two-and-a-half of you, I am sorry. I’ve let you down. I began writing this column with the intent of becoming the community’s source of nonsense. Your escape into the flapdoodle, the baloney, the rubbish, wack, codswallop, and bushwa. But not … [Read more...] about Out Driveled
Wanted
The girl of my dreams. Description: A willing participant to be my girlfriend, and potential life partner. If you respond, and I like you, then that’s that. You have be to my girlfriend. No takesies-backsies. Requirements: Must laugh at all my jokes. They’re literally all I have. Must be a girl. None of this werewolf behavior of “in between being a girl” or “I … [Read more...] about Wanted